what is love?

Today marks the day I have been with my wonderful boyfriend for a whole 7 years. 

That's right, I said 7 years. I have been with him for literally 1/3 of my life. Guys, I'm pretty sure in some states we are common law married. 

So this is a tribute blog to my best friend, my partner in crime, and my knight and shining armor. 

We were so lucky to have met so early in life (I was 14, him 16) and to have the opportunity to grow up together. We have been through high school together, cheering him on whenever he'd get a touchdown, we've been through a summer of lineman school (the electric kind, not football kind), we've been through a super depressing college freshman year (it was rough folks), and now we are here. Me, in my last year at school and finishing up graduate school, and him, after just buying a nice home and venturing off into adulthood. 

This is the type of thing I love about life and love. God puts you in the most perfect situations sometimes, and I just think it is awesome. I would have never fathomed that my first kiss would be my last, and honestly, I'm thinking that's what is going to happen with him (knock on wood).

I have always been realistic about the situations we have been in. I mean, to start dating at such a young age (I mean, 14? I was a BABY) it is hard to even fathom that a couple can last through all of the changes associated with "growing up." College, the first jobs, being away from each other for extended periods of time, personality changes, the fact that your brain LITERALLY ISN'T EVEN DEVELOPED YET (shout-out to my cognition slp's out there). 

Luckily I am here now. And I don't think I really have to worry about our brains changing any more (we are at the end of the age where that frontal lobe is developing, so I think I made it!) and as we get older I love him more and more every. single. day. 

I always had to remind myself through all of these changes, that it is OKAY if we were to not work out. I mean, when you are in a relationship so young you have two choices: Either grow together, or grow apart. The key there is growing. You change, it is inevitable, and luckily for us we were blessed to grow together and still maintain the interest and love towards one another. 

I still remember the first dance we had, and I remember how nervous I was to fathom talking to a Junior football player when I was a measly little freshman who had never even had her first kiss. But he was the sweetest boy I could come into contact with, and now he has grown into the sweetest man I know. 

We've been through 4 proms, 8 homecoming dances, like 14 billion dates, spending time at the lake together every summer for the past 6 years (did I mention somehow we both HAVE A COTTAGE AT THE SAME LAKE. ACROSS FROM EACH OTHER. Can you say fate?), 100 trillion forehead kisses, a few vacations, countless hugs, too many good-byes, not enough hellos, getting our first jobs, getting degrees, quitting jobs, making new friends (together), and so, so, so much more. 

There isn't enough room to explain the life that I have been lucky to live with him. I literally feel like the luckiest person in the world to have the opportunity to be with such an amazing man. He's my rock. Literally. Don't get me wrong, I'm pretty independent (I mean he does refer to me as "the Boss") but I never find myself completely comfortable when I am without him. 

So, with that all said, I just want to thank you, Bug, for being with me through all of these changes and going through this adventure called life, with me. 

Love you so much, and I'm so happy to have the opportunity to spend the rest of my life with you. 

the truth behind "i love you."

I have recently been noticing a lot of "Happy 6 months!" or "Happy 4 days!" and "Happy 2 years" on Twitter. It really has gotten me thinking. What I am thinking about is how all of these couples, the 6 month, 4 day and 2 year relationships, are saying "I love you". They are all a very different ranges of time. But does that have any effect on what "I love you" truly means? 

Personally I have always felt that the only time you should tell someone you love them is when you are completely comfortable with that person. And I mean completely comfortable. So comfortable that they you are willing to look your worst, so comfortable you are willing to tickle them, so comfortable that you can tell them everything ranging from your deepest secrets to the fact that you don't feel good and are going to spend the next hour in the bathroom. I think that that is what love is.   

Love is nasty, embarrassing, honest, funny, wierd, awkward, crazy, relieving, patient, ridiculous, love is beautiful. Love is kind of like being on anethseia, you don't really know why you feel so comfortable and content, but you do. Love has this overwhelming prensence when that special someone is in the room with you. No matter how much you think the other person is annoying, you know that you would be crazy without that "annoyingness". That is what love is. So, because of that I was a late bloomer to the whole "love thing" in my relationship. We waited until 8 months to say those lovely 3 words and it seemed to work out fine for us. I mean, we haven't gone a day without saying it in 3 years, so I would say that is pretty successful.  

Here is what some of my Twitter Followers had to say when I asked "How soon is it okay to say I love you?":  "Whenever it feels right for you, there is no "perfect" time, and usually you'll just know anyway."- Ann "When you literally cant see yourself with out them and you can not only all them your lover but best friend."- Taylor "Whenever you feel it. whenever you know the person inside & out and still can fall head over heels for them. never a set time. "- Brit But what do you think? Maybe I am crazy to get annoyed when there are people saying "i luv u baby"  after two days of dating. Maybe they were shot in the head by cupids love arrow and they can't contain themselves.  What I'm thinking is that arrow they were shot by was more of the infatuation arrow than the love arrow. But that's just a guess.  

 So please, leave your opinions in the comments. I want to see what you lovely folks think. Have at it. Keep calm, and party on friends. If YOU want to be featured in some upcoming posts, follow me on the Twitter machine. We'll have fun.  PS: Make sure to enter this super awesome giveaway going on.   

god love.

Here it is! The last installment of my "Love" series for February.
The love that I am going to talk about to day is definitely the most important kind of loves out there.
God love, i.e. Agape. 
No, no, not like "A Gape" one word. Agape. It probably has that little swish above the e, but I don't know how to make one, so...you'll just have to deal. 
Annnnyway... 

God love.
I think of it this way. How on earth would you be able to love anyone, anything, everything with out this kind of love first. God is who gave us our life, who gave us everything we have, everything we need, and who is the one person you can completely count on. He will be there with you through the hardships, through the most wonderful times. He will be there with you through everything.
Now this isn't a religious blog, at all. And nor do I want it to be. But I am posting this because I am a religious person. 
I don't care if you are Catholic, Methodist, Evangelical, as long as you believe in God then I believe that you will go to heaven and have eternal life. 
You can disagree, whatever, just don't comment with something rude.
God is my everything. Your everything. God IS everything. 
That flower sitting outside your window? God made it.The blue skies? God made it.Your sister? God made her.The cheez-it you are about to shove into your mouth? God made it.
He made everything. Do you understand that? 
Without him, where would we be? We wouldn't be. There would be nothing.

I feel like so many people lose their faith based on petty things. "Why did God do this to me? If there was a God he wouldn't make my life so horrible. "
Horrible things happen to everyone. It's life. Do you not understand he is doing this to make us stronger, there is a reason for everything he does. Though you might not see it, if you have faith you shouldn't worry. 
I feel like Courtney, here, summed it up pretty well.
"To me, God love is: knowing you'll never hear God say out loud he loves you, or send you flowers on your birthday, but in every blessing that he gives you in life, that unconditional love he has for each of us is proven again and again, as it also states in the Bible :)"

What do you think? 
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significant other love.

CAUTION: Verrry sappy post ahead. Precede with caution.  

When anyone says the word "love" what do automoatically think of?  You think of significant others, right? At least I do when it is in the context of Valentines day.  Husband, wife, boyfriend, girlfriend.  

Love is something that everyone needs to experiance, especially love in that special someone. It's so wierd having someone you are completely comfortable around and someone that you can share everything with. Wierd, but amazing. Someone who you aren't afraid to be yourself with, someone who knows your quirks and still loves you for you. Someone who annoys the heck  outta you, but you still love them nonetheless. And the things that happen to annoy you you actually kind of love. You know what I'm talking about? If feels like you are two peices of completely different puzzles that happen to fit together perfectly. At least that is the way I see it. Some of my readers see it this way. " Love is something you feel not necessarily something you just say. When you love someone its supposed to be un-explainable, its something you just know. Personally, I think there are too many people that throw it around when in a relationship just because they feel obligated to "express" saying I love you to their significant other. When you feel love, you know it and you show it to someone without even knowing it, its not something that is forced when its real. Either its there or it isn't, you will just know. It won't be fake, and it won't be a lie, it will be real. Some people believe in love at first sight.. personally, I'm not sure. My opinion on love at first sight is that its just the start. It's like an answer or a hint that you should pursue the butterflies in your stomach because there just might be a prize down the road." - Ann "Love is the reason that I wake up next to my best friend every day. It's the reason I can look at him when I'm pissed at him. It's the reason that we are more than lovers, we are friends. Love made us more than just two people sharing a home. Love made us a family" - Roxxy
 

I am lucky enough to have found love at such a young age, and who knows if that will change over the course of my college years, but if it does I will never regret the time I am currently spending with my man. We have grown up with each other, we have changed with each other, and we will continue to change over the course of the years.   

Don't get me wrong though, I'm not the type to go out and say that I will one day marry my high school sweetheart, or high school/college sweetheart, or you know what I mean. But I do believe that love is something that changes and grows over the years and I hope that no matter what happens we both end up the happiest ever.   

 Who do you love? Why do you love them?        

family love.

Whether you like it or not, they are always there for you. Through thick and thin.Through good and bad. Through the firsts and lasts. Through everything.  

Though we might not want to admit it, everyone wants to be loved by a family member in some way or another. I am lucky enough to have a HUGE family that loves me and cares for me. (And, it is seriously HUGE, I have two step parents and two biological so when I was walking onto the floor for senior night I have four people attached to my arm. I felt like I needed to put a sign on my back saying "wide-load") Just take time right now to think about how much your family has influenced you through your life. Done? Okay, what did you think about? (Let me know in the comments)

 What I thought about was spending time at my Grandmas house, just chillin' and eating chili cheese fritos and just enjoying eachothers presence.  It's that kind of thing that makes you love your family. How can I remember something so little such as eating chili cheese fritos? Because there was love in that house. There was love in that room, there was love in each of our hearts.  And even now, 12 years later, when I happen to eat some of those frito's I still think of my Grandma. Every time.

Here's what Blanca had to say about it: 
"Everyone loves differently and in their own way. Who am I to say there is only one kind of love. I love my family and my dog but I love my husband and children more than I love anyone or anything. My love for my husband and children is a different love and a bond. I don't agree in "one love". I also love witnessing kindness in others. I mean I love it. It brings be joy and brings me to tears sometimes. The selflessness that some people show in our world and in this time makes me love, love." 

  If you have a wonderful family setting and you are surrounded by people you love, don't take advantage of that. Seriously. So many people in the world are dying to have a family like yours. God has blessed you and remember that. And to those of you out there who have the "not-so-great" families, remember when you start one of your own to make it the best family ever.   Love every child, sister, brother, mother, father, grandma, grandpa, aunt, uncle or cousin to the fullest. Believe me, it will never be a mistake.   Tell me about your favorite family memories. I want to know.     

friend love.

Here's the first instillation of my series of "love" posts. 
The first love that we are going to talk about is "friend love". AKA your best friends. The ones who you will tell anything too and who you look forward to seeing and hanging out. You miss them when they are gone. You aren't the same when the other isn't there. 
That kind of love, you know? ;)




I have one friend that is like that. 

Her name is Erika. She's cool. 
We go to the same school, have the same classes, and pretty much have relatively the same personality. People mistake us for one another at least once every day. Even teachers. Yea, it's weird. 

One of the readers of the last post, Taesha, said "Love, to me, is patience. joy. and laughter. If someone can make me laugh, make me happy, and is patient with me; then i love em'!" 
Isn't that what a best friend is? Someone to laugh with and someone that you are happy with, and someone you are patient with even when you think they are being irrational? I mean, that is what you have to do to be a good friend. 
Being a friend is such a big thing in someones life, sure you can be "Best Friends" with your significant other, but you still need that affection from someone who can understand the "girl" aspects in your life. You know? Feel free to disagree with me, but that is what I believe. I need someone to talk to about my significant other when there are problems. I need someone to help keep me strong when I go through rough times. 

Friend love is just one of the many loves out there. But it is a wonderful thing. Just like all of the loves. But there are also different opinions out disputing whether or not there is truly one love or more. Here are some of the other opinions...

"how does someone love a cheeseburger, and then say i love my husband?

there's only one love. one love=the person you spend your life with, the person you cherish, the person you kiss goodnight...that person can be "your love" or the person "you love" or the person you say "i love you" to. it can be used as a verb or a noun. ;) ..and then...you really really really enjoy/like/are fond of/ cheeseburgers." - Karly 

"Everyone loves differently and in their own way. Who am I to say there is only one kind of love. I love my family and my dog but I love my husband and children more than I love anyone or anything. My love for my husband and children is a different love and a bond. I don't agree in "one love". I also love witnessing kindness in others. I mean I love it. It brings be joy and brings me to tears sometimes. The selflessness that some people show in our world and in this time makes me love, love." - Blanca

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If you are new to this post, go look here and it will explain everything. I'd love for all of you to participate. Thanks! And what do you think of "Friend Love"?